Medicated Heart

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This image is of an "inflamed" heart. As you can see, it is swollen; the dark clouds around it could represent congestion or depression. Because of the swelling, it is fiery; the sort of heart that is aching for relief.

Also, I think it is interesting to consider, the thorns around the heart are full of dis-ease. So as you can see, a crucifix is coming down into the heart, to give it some relief. This crucifix is a Gift from God. Certainly, it could be the discovery of some new sort of medication, much needed for the situation. For without this help, the muscles of the heart and above the heart would begin to contract and become knotted. That's already happening here.

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This image below is
a typical depiction of a Sacred Heart,
being inducted by God's Gift.

As you can see, there's a weeping "eye" in there... It is closed and resting.

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I am very lucky to know many people from various cultures, who have blessed me with their knowledge and resources. This is how I found my Tui Na healer. She works on the farthest reaches of the city, and I must go far to see her. She learned her skill in Vietnam. Because she is not a licensed practitioner, she only takes donations. There is a kindness about her I see in very few people. Even though she is younger than me, there is something about her that reminds me of my mother, when Mom was young and loving. She is sincere and very cute, with freckles on her face.


"I only help the people as long as they are in pain," she explained. "Then I tell them, no more, because I get afraid..."

"Of course," I said. "You would have to stop working on them... Because people should learn how to take care of themselves. If they are in pain, they will respect you. If they are no longer in pain, they will just use you."

This looks like how I feel before a session...
(See how Lon Chaney also has a bit of a sinus problem?)

Then she gets on top of me with her entire body weight... She begins to knead the paralysis out of my face and neck with her knuckles. Pushing it slowly, like stiff, frozen meat, down through the chi lines of my arm or leg, she takes it out through my fingers and toes.

The toe-part is the most painful! She will grab me by the pinkie, pick me up, and shake my entire body by the pinkie, beating me against the floor while I am screaming "ow!! ow!! ow!!" After which she "breaks" it out of me. The suddenly all the paralysis goes "snap" - out of my pinkie toe - and is gone, forever.

Perhaps "ow!" is the universal language? Or have I got it all wrong? (It's supposed to be "Om", not "Ow!")

So far I have had 6 half-hour sessions with Loi. Early this year, we were surprised to find, my tonsil was paralyzed. It was pulling on all the muscles above my heart. It was putting pressure on my brain.

When she went in and got all that stuff out of me, I wept bitterly. I just couldn't believe how much hatred and anger I was holding there.

How is it, my doctors could not detect any of that?

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Lord, I've got to be careful about not liking doctors... It's giving me a bad attitude! I was stressed out during that last pap-smear, God. The doctor was so up-tight!! She was making her assistant nervous; the assistant was shaking, then she couldn't get the sample into the sample jar. Then, the doctor later bawled me out for talking to her assistant. (I'm not sure I should go back.) It's too bad for them I have some standards, Lord!

Please give me some guidance on this... No one is quite like that great Japanese residential doctor I had! He was handsome! He also smelled like apple blossoms. At least, Jesus, he had a clue as to what was wrong! He was kind, he was professional. He was a great listener, attentive and sweet. Remember when I made him cookies...? He said he couldn't accept them, for professional reasons. Still, he was honest at all times. He put his ego aside and actually admitted to the limitations he had, as a medical scientist. He gave me options and alternatives. Everyone at the hospital adored him, Jesus; it was because he is adorable. I watched him Lord... He treated everyone equally, with the same respect and dignity.

Help me, Jesus, to uphold this criteria for anyone who needs to get all-up into my life. Amen.

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Lady's Heart

The Lady's Heart loves to get all-up in your business. (That's what the birds are for.) That's why she's a little hardened, and maybe, if she's learned some lessons she will also know when to knock-it off, back-off and relax.

We ladies love to embellish ourselves with all sorts of decorations to make ourselves look softer, more approachable and touchable... But deep inside, there's a lot of pain there! Many of us take it right to our graves.

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Dear Lord, help the women of the world to let go
of the things that steal our energy,
are a waste of time, and feel like dead-ends.
Help us women in the world feel more confident
about stepping out of traditional roles
like being mothers, grandmothers...
Nurses, secretaries and baby-sitters.
Sure, these roles are important,
but so are we, individually.


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We have a lot more to give,
starting with giving to ourselves.
Help us to drop our expectations of others
so we can see them for who they truly are.
Help us to follow our true interests,
educations and passions,
so we can be more effective on the planet,
and in the lives of other beings.

Help us to clearly know we have choices, God.


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Help us to understand
we don't have to be reacting,
help us to find our timing
so we are better
at responding.
Help us to keep our egos
from getting all-up-into-it, God!
Help us to keep ourselves
from jerking people around.
Our hearts need more resilience, Jesus,
by being good stewards of our energy,
our value-judgments
and attitudes towards others.
We like to say we are patient, even good to others,
but our egos and our money
are all-up-into-it, God.

Help this heart, our real hearts;
it's about what's going on
inside,
not outside, of who
we are that matters.


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Dear Jesus, protect us from those who would blame
and accuse us, undermine and not communicate with us or defend us.
Help us to forgive Those
Who Screw Us Over,
that we don't end up walking around poisoned.
Teach us, Jesus,
Show them to us, let us know who they are so
we can turn the other way.
Help us to stop enabling, and excusing the ignorance in this home,
on this planet;
keep us from feeling personally responsible, God,
for those who misuse and abuse;
they have choices, too.
Let me simply be a light in their lives.
Lord God,
that's all I ask.



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