Y
The Verb ’to Love’
by Todd Rundgren
Some people tell me that love is a feeling,
Or a possession;
Somehow that seems so cold.
And when they say love is sweet,
Does it mean that you eat it?
Maybe you drink it?
Does it fill up an empty hole?
I’m lookin’ for a love and I may not find it.
You know it doesn’t mean a thing
Without some action behind it!
Please come home...
I can hear them calling
Please come home
Please don’t leave us all alone...
Your mama and your papa are crying all alone.
You better let it magnetize; learn to sacrifice,
’til we get the true version of - -
The meaning of the verb "to love".
What
does
it mean
to love?
And when somebody needs love,
Do they spend some money?
Say something funny,
Ask for some tenderness?
And when you wanna touch of love,
Do you lie on your back?
Stand on your head?
How do you feel it best?
I’m looking for a love with no strings attached,
To take me like I am - that’s the only catch!
Please come home...
I can hear them calling,
Please come home
Please don’t leave us all alone...
Your wife and your lover are crying all alone.
You better let it magnetize - learn to sacrifice...
’Til we learn the true version of
The meaning of the verb "to love".
Does it mean any more,
The more you talk about it?
Is it any more real
If you jump around and shout it?
I’m sick and tired of hearing
’bout everyone without it
and
Too much talkin’ sends me walkin’.
Night is falling and
everybody’s calling
for
love.
Everybody’s lookin’ for their one and only.
It’s only just a game ’cause they’re scared
to be lonely.
Please come home...
I can hear them calling,
Please come home
Please don’t leave us all alone...
Your brothers and your sisters are crying all alone.
You got let it magnetize, learn to sacrifice -
’til we get the true version of
The meaning
of the verb
"to love".
What
does
it mean
to love?
c)Warner-Tamerlane Publishing Corp; Humanoid Music
Y
I am not an expert in boundaries. But I am a firm believer in learning when to turn the other cheek and walk away!
There are so many people who are going through life, not only wounded, but toxic. We all have our crosses to bear, don't we? And with some luck and a lot of work on ourselves, getting our hearts into a place of wanting to feel good, asking for balance and well-being, we have access to all kinds of tools and information to get us through. Ideally we should be able to reach a continuum in our lives where we can always feel good... Knowing that happiness is a choice. Let me tell you about it: this is what self-realization is all about.
In other words, we start to feel that we are walking in God's Light. (Because we feel good!)
How is it that someone who is so "nice", so kind, so thoughtful, can attract someone who gossips, slanders others and dumps all over them?
Here's my response... It's because they feel safe with us.
But be mindful that Jesus only helped those who came to Him and asked for help.
There are a lot of people out there who are actually crying for help, and don't know it. Never presume that you know what is best for another person; take your time.
It's one thing to accept people and love them unconditionally; it is quite other things to share in their guilt. This is why everyone needs to understand what healthy boundaries are.
I know people who truly suffer from some sort of "lack" in their minds... They use drugs and alcohol regularly; they get hooked-up into strange practices and beliefs about themselves and others; they make fetishes out of things, and out of themselves (I.E. some celebrities are known to do this); they define themselves through what they do, and not by watching their ways of being; they make overtures to control others because they are afraid of being abandoned, or they can't handle rejection in any form. Who doesn't struggle?
The challenge comes with a desire to grow... Because when people are bored, they start creating trouble for themselves and others.
This is a lot of what was going on around Jesus... In fact, He never offered to help anyone unless they first asked. Jesus understood the intrinsic nature of chaos, and what it could do to the spirit of mankind.
I've noticed a pattern in my own life, of being surrounded by people who need to confide and gossip about others. Sure, we are all human beings and we talk about other people because we want to understand what drives them, what hurts them. I think I am a safe person for people to confide in, simply because I don't go to their hang-outs. I want to shift some of this chaos out of my life.
I find, if I try to ascertain my own opinions directly about the person who is dishing dirt, I am often cut-off, or find myself in a situation where the speaker becomes contentious and judgmental of me. This is always shocking! But after 50 years of practice, I finally get it.
In the past, it has been their way of keeping me in my place (as a listener). So I have had to learn to walk away, stop participating - and even put my hand up in someone's face and tell them "Talk To the Hand"! Does it get any ruder than that?! It can, because I am a human being and I have my limitations, too.
No one should be chastising you about your life. We are all doing this walk on Planet Heart as free agents; whether we want to believe or accept that or not is inconsequential. If someone hurts you, it is only a side-effect of the real problems going on.
The fact is, when one person disrespects another person's space, time, privacy, background, history, story, religious or spiritual practices, that is not love. It's something else.
It is ultimately a show of disrespect because that person's soul process is not being honored. To recognize this, and to draw back on one's tendency to CONTROL another person is a healthy boundary. Also, seeing-through someone else who is trying to control us is important.
We need these boundaries in our private lives, but also at work, and in dating and in marriage. We need them in our friendships. We do not necessarily need to be spilling our guts to individuals we don't know. People take information and sometimes use it as ammunition. Many friendships have been hurt and ruined, because people cannot keep their mouths shut and their sex lives private, for example.
We have to watch our patterns with people... And know when to knock it off.
The best clue will be that it just doesn't feel good. It isn't fun anymore.
I have written in other areas of this blog where some people feel they need to have fun at another person's expense... Be very sober and careful when that happens. Anyone who behaves in hurtful ways like that is probably not a safe person to be hanging with.
Y
We also do not need to know everything about someone in one night. It is better to allow a relationship to develop over increments and periods of time... (Rather than download on someone for two solid hours, for example; or sleep with them on the first date.)
If you want some real love in your life, take your time getting to know people. Watch the warning signals you get; make a personal note of the red-flags you get. Pay attention to people who are trying to communicate honestly with you; they are trying to tell you something! People give us signals all the time; but perhaps we are the toxic ones who are not paying attention until the situation gets ugly? Ask them more questions, if you need better understanding regarding what you sense or feel. Don't presume. Never presume! (Check out my Mr. Roger's sections.)
If you allow someone to download on you and not give you a breather, they will come back with more. So knowing your own limitations in this regard is also an important boundary. Know when to say "enough already" to someone who is trying to control you.
Don't be afraid to give someone the consequences of their actions!
"If that's your attitude or that's how you feel about things, this is how it's going to play out with me..."
It felt great to do this with my mother the other day... She is always bitching about her health. In conversations I have given her countless suggestions on how to feel better. I even began to help her work out a 90-day dietary plan - which she dismissed and put down.
So I said - "Gee, then I guess this gives us a good reason not to talk about how sick you are anymore!" I acted really happy about it!
She got upset about that.
"Well," I asked her, "why should we talk about it if you don't plan to make any changes in your life? And you expect your doctors to do all that for you?" Then she changed her tune.
You might need some time to step back and evaluate the pay-offs in the situation. This is why so many people get into relationships where they feel as if they are being used - they ARE being used! People use one another as vehicles to grow. This isn't exactly ethical, but if they can do it? They will.
We need to be able to say NO to certain situations when the time is right. Sometimes this begins privately, within our own awareness. But the bottom line is, if we let someone control us, we are just as guilty as they are. And we should ask for, and seek the genuine help we need from someone who can guide us to move forward. That's another healthy boundary.
There are so many people who are going through life, not only wounded, but toxic. We all have our crosses to bear, don't we? And with some luck and a lot of work on ourselves, getting our hearts into a place of wanting to feel good, asking for balance and well-being, we have access to all kinds of tools and information to get us through. Ideally we should be able to reach a continuum in our lives where we can always feel good... Knowing that happiness is a choice. Let me tell you about it: this is what self-realization is all about.
In other words, we start to feel that we are walking in God's Light. (Because we feel good!)
Y
So, many of you are asking, why is it that a happy, "nice", kind person attracts people who are hateful and mean-spirited?How is it that someone who is so "nice", so kind, so thoughtful, can attract someone who gossips, slanders others and dumps all over them?
Here's my response... It's because they feel safe with us.
But be mindful that Jesus only helped those who came to Him and asked for help.
There are a lot of people out there who are actually crying for help, and don't know it. Never presume that you know what is best for another person; take your time.
It's one thing to accept people and love them unconditionally; it is quite other things to share in their guilt. This is why everyone needs to understand what healthy boundaries are.
I know people who truly suffer from some sort of "lack" in their minds... They use drugs and alcohol regularly; they get hooked-up into strange practices and beliefs about themselves and others; they make fetishes out of things, and out of themselves (I.E. some celebrities are known to do this); they define themselves through what they do, and not by watching their ways of being; they make overtures to control others because they are afraid of being abandoned, or they can't handle rejection in any form. Who doesn't struggle?
The challenge comes with a desire to grow... Because when people are bored, they start creating trouble for themselves and others.
This is a lot of what was going on around Jesus... In fact, He never offered to help anyone unless they first asked. Jesus understood the intrinsic nature of chaos, and what it could do to the spirit of mankind.
Y
I've noticed a pattern in my own life, of being surrounded by people who need to confide and gossip about others. Sure, we are all human beings and we talk about other people because we want to understand what drives them, what hurts them. I think I am a safe person for people to confide in, simply because I don't go to their hang-outs. I want to shift some of this chaos out of my life.
I find, if I try to ascertain my own opinions directly about the person who is dishing dirt, I am often cut-off, or find myself in a situation where the speaker becomes contentious and judgmental of me. This is always shocking! But after 50 years of practice, I finally get it.
In the past, it has been their way of keeping me in my place (as a listener). So I have had to learn to walk away, stop participating - and even put my hand up in someone's face and tell them "Talk To the Hand"! Does it get any ruder than that?! It can, because I am a human being and I have my limitations, too.
Y
No one should be chastising you about your life. We are all doing this walk on Planet Heart as free agents; whether we want to believe or accept that or not is inconsequential. If someone hurts you, it is only a side-effect of the real problems going on.
The fact is, when one person disrespects another person's space, time, privacy, background, history, story, religious or spiritual practices, that is not love. It's something else.
It is ultimately a show of disrespect because that person's soul process is not being honored. To recognize this, and to draw back on one's tendency to CONTROL another person is a healthy boundary. Also, seeing-through someone else who is trying to control us is important.
We need these boundaries in our private lives, but also at work, and in dating and in marriage. We need them in our friendships. We do not necessarily need to be spilling our guts to individuals we don't know. People take information and sometimes use it as ammunition. Many friendships have been hurt and ruined, because people cannot keep their mouths shut and their sex lives private, for example.
We have to watch our patterns with people... And know when to knock it off.
The best clue will be that it just doesn't feel good. It isn't fun anymore.
I have written in other areas of this blog where some people feel they need to have fun at another person's expense... Be very sober and careful when that happens. Anyone who behaves in hurtful ways like that is probably not a safe person to be hanging with.
Y
We also do not need to know everything about someone in one night. It is better to allow a relationship to develop over increments and periods of time... (Rather than download on someone for two solid hours, for example; or sleep with them on the first date.)
If you want some real love in your life, take your time getting to know people. Watch the warning signals you get; make a personal note of the red-flags you get. Pay attention to people who are trying to communicate honestly with you; they are trying to tell you something! People give us signals all the time; but perhaps we are the toxic ones who are not paying attention until the situation gets ugly? Ask them more questions, if you need better understanding regarding what you sense or feel. Don't presume. Never presume! (Check out my Mr. Roger's sections.)
If you allow someone to download on you and not give you a breather, they will come back with more. So knowing your own limitations in this regard is also an important boundary. Know when to say "enough already" to someone who is trying to control you.
Don't be afraid to give someone the consequences of their actions!
"If that's your attitude or that's how you feel about things, this is how it's going to play out with me..."
It felt great to do this with my mother the other day... She is always bitching about her health. In conversations I have given her countless suggestions on how to feel better. I even began to help her work out a 90-day dietary plan - which she dismissed and put down.
So I said - "Gee, then I guess this gives us a good reason not to talk about how sick you are anymore!" I acted really happy about it!
She got upset about that.
"Well," I asked her, "why should we talk about it if you don't plan to make any changes in your life? And you expect your doctors to do all that for you?" Then she changed her tune.
You might need some time to step back and evaluate the pay-offs in the situation. This is why so many people get into relationships where they feel as if they are being used - they ARE being used! People use one another as vehicles to grow. This isn't exactly ethical, but if they can do it? They will.
Y
We need to be able to say NO to certain situations when the time is right. Sometimes this begins privately, within our own awareness. But the bottom line is, if we let someone control us, we are just as guilty as they are. And we should ask for, and seek the genuine help we need from someone who can guide us to move forward. That's another healthy boundary.
Y
It is not easy to be honest. Sometimes we can only be honest by walking away from someone... (Because maybe it is our body language they are trying to hook-into, anyway.)
When you feel good about being with someone, you won't be holding any resistance in any part of your body. If you feel that you have to posture yourself, your voice, your ways of being, if you can't be natural, getting out of the unnatural responses are going to take some honesty on your part.
Also, it can be hard if someone is in pain, for instance, yet you can see that they are actually enjoying their pain...? Choosing certain elements and volitions to keep themselves in the pain or situation of lack, you will at some point be required to ask yourself if you are being their enabler.
We cannot change other people. We can only change ourselves.
It's okay. I am fully aware that I am here as an extension of Source Energy, burning through Karma... I learned that we don't have to put in a major petition to God on their behalf. We can light a candle for them.
fire dakini
I think this person was lucky to have me in her life for as long as she did.
She took me for granted. We thought we had an honest friendship, but we could never talk about our friendship or how it was playing out, honestly.
So I turn personalities like this over to Christ, and just send them white light.
Life is too short, ya know? We have better things to do with our time and energy on this earth walk; and Christ has shown us that through His teachings.
Y
When you feel good about being with someone, you won't be holding any resistance in any part of your body. If you feel that you have to posture yourself, your voice, your ways of being, if you can't be natural, getting out of the unnatural responses are going to take some honesty on your part.
Also, it can be hard if someone is in pain, for instance, yet you can see that they are actually enjoying their pain...? Choosing certain elements and volitions to keep themselves in the pain or situation of lack, you will at some point be required to ask yourself if you are being their enabler.
We cannot change other people. We can only change ourselves.
Y
I once offered to pray for someone... And she reprimanded me for it, saying that she didn't want my prayers, because she felt my prayers would interfere with her spiritual practice.It's okay. I am fully aware that I am here as an extension of Source Energy, burning through Karma... I learned that we don't have to put in a major petition to God on their behalf. We can light a candle for them.
fire dakiniI think this person was lucky to have me in her life for as long as she did.
She took me for granted. We thought we had an honest friendship, but we could never talk about our friendship or how it was playing out, honestly.
So I turn personalities like this over to Christ, and just send them white light.
Life is too short, ya know? We have better things to do with our time and energy on this earth walk; and Christ has shown us that through His teachings.
Y
If someone is acting as if they must control you, somehow, in order to have a relationship with you? That relationship is not worth keeping.
Y
People who give you freedom will also give you honesty.
Y
This blog has a consistent theme... It's about coming out of slavery and into freedom.
We can change ourselves!
Starting with prayer and meditation, we can begin to refocus our intentions on things that support and empower us to be happier.
We can choose to reach for positive emotions, and use negative situations and people as pivotal points to choose something better.
We can choose to get ourselves free from worry.
We can focus on those things that we really want in our lives, and ask ourselves a lot of questions about WHY. This helps us to track our spiritual intentions.
We can get free of being compulsive, by choosing stillness, quiet and peace with God.
We can choose to participate in positive things because they inspire us...
Using these values helps the chaos in our lives to fall away.
We can learn to persist, rather than resist and keep ourselves locked in pain.
We can allow ourselves to go through a complete cycle of emotions, and persist in reaching for those feelings that help us to feel better.
We can learn to speak with one another more honestly and be heard.
These are ways of working through inner inspiration where we can watch for the manifestation of God's Love... The spirit is always there.
We can change ourselves!
Starting with prayer and meditation, we can begin to refocus our intentions on things that support and empower us to be happier.
We can choose to reach for positive emotions, and use negative situations and people as pivotal points to choose something better.
We can choose to get ourselves free from worry.
We can focus on those things that we really want in our lives, and ask ourselves a lot of questions about WHY. This helps us to track our spiritual intentions.
We can get free of being compulsive, by choosing stillness, quiet and peace with God.
We can choose to participate in positive things because they inspire us...
Using these values helps the chaos in our lives to fall away.
We can learn to persist, rather than resist and keep ourselves locked in pain.
We can allow ourselves to go through a complete cycle of emotions, and persist in reaching for those feelings that help us to feel better.
We can learn to speak with one another more honestly and be heard.
These are ways of working through inner inspiration where we can watch for the manifestation of God's Love... The spirit is always there.
Y
